#2745: Obituary Editor
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[Text on the top-left corner of a gray newspaper page. It is slightly skewed counterclockwise:]
Obituaries
The cool, attractive, universally beloved
editor of the obituary section has died,
hopefully of natural causes after a long
life. They take with them the password to the
heretofore unrevealed auto-post system.
They are survived by 8 billion heartbroken
people. Memorial services will be held
daily in all public spaces from now on.
(Sourced from explainxkcd.com)
Title text:As the editor has reportedly defeated Death in a series of games of skill, no further obituaries are expected.